So here is a recap of our Saturday from a few weeks ago.
Myers got recruited to make a little cash for selling his soul. Everyone has a price and it turns out his is exactly 100 dollars. For the said monies he was required to drive to Idaho Falls pick up a company car and then drive it to Dubois Idaho where he would throw candy to the masses in a parade. We are a tight knit family so the boys and I went along for the ride but since we are awesome we went for free. This is a little recap of our day.
8:00 am- we leave Rexburg in a mad dash so that we can arrive to the main st branch at the appointed time of 8:30. Since we are running behind I did not have time to eat breakfast. This is only important for later in this story.
8:30 we arrive on time by some miracle or speeding. Ok it was speeding. We are rewarded with our promptness by waiting for 15 minutes for the girl with the keys to the van to arrive.
8:45 am we head into the desert where I learn that Dubois is an hour away. Suddenly I think I should have held out for some type of reimbursement.
9:10 We are now safely in the middle of nowhere when Thing 2 announces that he has to pee right now! We decided that the only thing to do was pull off the side of the road and allow him to whiz like the locals do. You know on tires. Myers reasoned that since we had made up some mad time and since we didn't have to be to the parade route until 9:45 we would be safe. Thing 1 sees his chance to weedle outside so he seizes that moment. I am not an expert as to the particulars of outdoor relief but I figured that it did not require much effort. The boys hiked down the embankment and slide behind some overgrown sage brush risking life and limb in the name of modesty. Joke was on them because all they did was walk around to provide a full frontal view.
9:45 we arrive at the branch and pick up the other guy who is to help and head to the sight.
10:00 The parade should have started but instead all I am seeing is a bunch of people milling around.
10:05 I start my rant about how being on time is everything and if these people worked in my kitchen they would all be fired.
10:10 I am now angry because the other guy we picked up is just talking and not even looking irritated. FINALLY the guy wonders over to which Myers asks when the show is going to get started he said 10:30. WHAT!?! When they sold this thing to us we were told the parade started at ten. Now my lack of breakfast is becoming a big big deal.
10:11 I am thinking about what I could eat and getting ready to be all hangry when I witnessed a real live horse boner. I am not sure if you are aware but I believe horse boners to be good omens so I settled down and then prayed that my boys would not notice the magical mystical world of nature at full attention next to us.
10:26 The line up for the parade route is starting so the boys and I snap this little picture.
10:30 turns out they do know the value of time and the thing kicks off. In seconds we are throwing 35 pounds of candy out and 400 I-phone speaker things.
10:40 We catch up to the chicken since he is walking in scuba flippers and we take this as a sign to take his picture of close
10:43 we circle back and drive half the parade route over again since it was so tiny.
10:45 the parade is over we are a hundred bucks richer and our senses have been fed
So there you have it. Some day I will know what I am doing with my life and then perhaps my posts won't be so sporadic. That was a lie they will still be.
