Boo Hoo

Life has gotten a little crazy around these parts which of course meant the first thing to go was this little project. I could come up with excuses but you are not here for excuses. I am pretty sure the reason you are here is poor grammar and run on sentences so shall we move forward.
I am being forced to come to terms with the fact that I am getting old. At first I pretended that I liked that. It started by embracing the wrinkles that are permanently etching themselves into my albino flesh. I told myself that they made me look more refined, more authentic. Then I realized that that was just tired Chris talking and she belongs locked up in some sort of well padded room. Then I tried to convince myself that getting older meant I was closer to retirement, then I checked my bank account and died a little inside. The final blow however came this year when the effects of me aging meant that my children are also aging and that slowly but surely the doors of their childhood are slamming shut.
The most painful of those doors thus far has been Halloween. As per tradition of stopping with the old trick or treating game at 12 it meant that this was Thing One's last time going door to door. I tried to put it out of my mind as I created one of the most epic costumes I have ever crafted but as the night loomed closer there was this gnawing feeling of despair. Then since he is my child he decided to kick a guy while he was down and asked to forgo Halloween night with Gram and Pops so he could trick or treat in his own neighborhood for the very last time. Like a dope I agreed. I tried to soothe that pain by dropping 60 bucks on Halloween candy which BTW I did not crack into until the actual night of Halloween. I deserve a medal please and thank you.
Despite my best attempts time marched forward and before I knew it the big night arrived. I had visions in my head as to how things were going to go and of course the reality was miles away from the expectations. I got left at home to pass out the candy and my kid didn't even look back.
Halloween has always meant a rowdy crowd and a group picture in front of the house. It is sitting back and watching Pops pace with excitement peaking through the window and calling out which candy he needs as per his algorithm which helps him decide which child deserves what particular treat. Its listening to Ma try to goad us into drinking her twenty two gallons of wasil. It's a constant stream of old friends and their kids and noise and chaos. This year was markedly different. By the end it was just Thing One and I walking our neighborhood, the neighborhood we waited a decade to belong to. Hand and hand I took my boy on his last adventure. It was quiet and dignified unlike the whimpering that followed later that night once he had passed out in a sugar induced coma. So while my mom heart is breaking wide open here is a recap of years past. If I wasn't such a disorganized slag I would have all of them but I changed computers as often as I changed addresses which is to say A LOT! So in the spirit of Halloween I am going to dress the part of an emotionally stable women when in reality I am the crazy cat lady chasing the evaporating moments of my kids youth.