Friday, September 5, 2014

These are the days of our lives



I found out that there is this thing called wordless Wednesday that I thought about participating in it this week. Then I realized that my collection of pictures would be so random that it might be considered to be one of those trendy art pieces and or cause panic that I was suffering a stroke so I let wordless Wednesday pass me by.  Now here we are at Friday and I started thinking well crap I better post something so crap it will be!
It has been wicked rainy around here lately. For a while I thought I was living in Washington again but the severe lack of ethnic diversity, hipsters and mobile homes transformed into coffee stands told me I was in fact still in Idaho- (drat) Apparently the inordinate amount of moisture is good for two things mold and moths libidos.We have been overrun by these flying pests.  So much so that they randomly fly out of the air vents when we drive. At first I thought that it was because our cars are always strewn with an unspeakable amount of boy trash. I was starting to get a complex but while I was running an errand at work a moth flew out of the air duct of the company van. Luckily I was in a fifteen passenger so there was plenty of room for the two of us. I can handle them in the car because you roll down a window and their tiny little bodies get sucked right out. This phenomenon is known as science.  However things got a little personal when they decided to stroll on into the house. The kids left the doors open and approximately nine thousand of those buggers came in. I am sure that they sent out evites which explains why the turn out to the party was so good.  There was no way that any human could sleep in these conditions so I turned Myers loose to fix the problem. This is what we got.




OK in fairness I did suggest the vacuum but in my defense any idea sounds amazing inside your head when there are creepy bugs playing the role of a kamikaze in your general area.
The following day I decided that we should do something together as a family and since I was becoming one with mother earth I deiced to embrace it and we hiked R Mountain again. This time we made it all the way to the top. Last year we tried and failed. We actually found out that we gave up twenty feet from the top. This immediately made me feel like a super winner. There were no incidents which I have to admit I was kind of bummed out by so I found last year’s recap and I will give it its own post. I did catch this pretty epic picture so here it is.

Along with moths we have been blessed with wind. I know that you all claim that the winds come sweeping down the plains in Oklahoma but I think I have you beat on this one. This happened-

That its right our trampoline full on flipped upside down in the wind. I did not witness this so I suppose that it could have been some random gnome union angry over my horrible lawn mowing skills but I doubt it.
Finally to round out this really random post I upped the ante on awesome parent of the year award. I got a call from thing ones school. They told me that he had had a playground accident and that he had blood all over his shirt and that I needed to bring him a new one. I am sure that if I had taken that helicopter parenting class I would have learned that the proper thing to do would be to stop my current task and run to his aid. Well this chump didn’t take that class so instead I finished up my task at work then went to pick him up. They told me that he had bit his tongue and I did feel bad for the poor kid  but figured that sitting on the sick bed would be fine for ten minutes. Of course my task took about twenty times longer than I had thought it would and when I got there and looked at the injury I felt horrible.

He stuck his tooth clean through his tongue! And yep I picked up and delivered 200 pounds of bread flour instead of flipping the truck around and racing to him in his hour of need. I felt HORRIBLE! When I asked him if he wanted to come home he shrugged his shoulders and said I don’t know how I am going to eat my celery but what do you think I should do?  Again I think the right thing to have done would be to swoop up my towering boy giant take him to get a Slurpee and cuddle and watch movies. Instead I told him he could choose and choose he did- to stay at school.  It was another serving of mom guilt when he got home and told me he couldn’t eat his lunch. At least I think that is what he said, his tongue was pretty swollen by this point and he could have been singing the lyrics to 99 luft balloons and I would  not have known the difference. Either way don’t get hurt on my watch clearly I am not fit to handle it.
So to recap- living in Idaho is pretty much like living out a plague, my boys are super tough and I make really awesome decisions, pretty much.



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